- - posted in Personal Expressions | Comments

Appearance, it is a topic that comes up regularly. We all wish it wasn’t what we are judged by but it is. My question, or rant, is why does everyone need to fit in a box?

I am of mixed decent. I am short and curvy, my hair style is a big afro, my skin is of olive tone. To be honest I think I am cute. I always have been told by friends, family and strangers that I am attractive. I was raised not to put too much emphasis on how I look, it could be taken away in a second. I was raised to search out the secret person of the heart. I have learned that I am a pretty strong woman. I’m the kind of lady you want on your side instead of against you. I love strongly and I am one eager to laugh at life.


My little sister

I know that I don’t fit in a ‘typical’ box, especially where I live. I am the minority here. I have been having conversations with my sister on the regular over appearance, mostly because we are different looking. My sister is an adorable petite young woman. She is an incredibly strong, intelligent, witty young lady. We differ over how we like to look. I love my curves while she is in toned and ready to run. My sister can do make up like nobodies business, I am talking art worthy techniques. While I am feeling very made up with powder, mascara and chapstick. I rarely flat iron my hair, it is really hard to find someone I trust to do that professionally in town and it is hard to make that time to straighten out all of my hair. My sister will flat iron her hair, maybe put in some clip in extensions and look absolutely FANTASTIC. We are just different but in this town we both stick out majorly.



I married a big blond white man, I married him because he is an incredible, incredible man. This has added to my, I don’t fit in to ‘typical box’. Then I went and had his baby, and he looks like a lot like my husband, a lot. This continued to point out how I am different. Personally I like the fact that we are a multicultural home. I love that we love each other for our differences.

I don’t know much else as my mother is a Latina and my father is African American, having more than one culture in a household is normal to me. What I don’t get is why people feel the need to point out that I am different. Why they need to question if my child is my own. Why they need to ask if I was adopted because my mother is light and doesn’t obviously look African American. Honestly, if you look at my mother and I closely we look a lot alike. If you take a good look at my son and I, we look a lot alike. Hell, if you look closely at my husband and I you would see we have similar facial features. But you have to be able to look past the color of our skin.

I was taught to look beyond color, and I am proud of it, just a shame not everyone else was taught to do the same. Try to take some time and open your eyes, we are a whole lot more alike than you may think.

Mom & Q

My mom & Quincy